Things I Can’t Friggin’ Believe IV

Here is number four in my random series of things I can’t friggin believe in the world of pop culture, the market, the economy, politics and whatever else grabs me on a laid back Saturday.

That Ashton Kutcher has one million twitter followers, that’s about 999,970 more people that saw him in The Butterfly Effect.

That we now have more Czars than Russia did.

That dictator groupie Obama is bowing to the Saudis, high five-ing Chavez, sending videos to Achmidinjahd and having shits and giggles with Castro.

That GM thinks they have a chance.

That we release our interrogation strategies to the world but are consumed with worry about how we will sugar coat the stress test results to the public.

That Donald Trump is always Forbes 100 but seems to go bankrupt every five minutes.

That NY Mets owner Fred Wilpon supposedly lost $500 million in the Madoff scam and has Citigroup as his main sponsor. Ouch

That Janet Nepolitano, Sheila Baer and Janet Reno don’t have their own reality show called “Dem Babes and Our Fashion Secrets”

That Keith Olberman exists.

That IYR and the commercial real estate sector are trading like they cured cancer.

That Dendreon is because they are.

That Cramer continues to lie like a rug to the American people.

That CNBC ( Crappy Nonsense By Charlatans) has snooked the folks for 20 years. Congrats. We have Internet now, why do we need them?

That Donny Deutcsh gets another shot, same crap, different name-you too can make a million with a water proof egg timer. When you build, not inherit, I’ll listen. Arrogant schmuckweed.

That Jeff Zucker at NBC lost $45 million on the second most watched Super Bowl in history. This guy would screw up breathing.

That I haven’t egged Ruth Madoff’s house yet.

That John Mayer and Al Franken still exist.

That anyone believes China’s numbers.

That Hyman Roth and Michael Corleone really are in Cuba now, but Roth is saying to Michael, ” we will be bigger than Stocktwits,” not U.S Steel.

That Israel hasn’t bombed Iran yet.

That FSLR hasn’t broken $50 yet.

That American Express is paying us to rip up our cards, but their stock has doubled, last I checked, that’s their business.

That Aubrey McClendan isn’t on wth Cramer anymore.

That Aubrey McClendon served me my Whopper today.

That Ivan Boesky and Micheal Milken look like choir boys compared to the new breed of grifter.

That Aubrey McClendon squeegied my windshield today.

That Joe Terranova gets face time–even on the street.

That Botany 500 hasn’t sued Joe Terranova for giving bad cloths an even worse name.

That some financial pundits wear shoulder pads and pony tails on TV.

That Dylan Radigan didn’t leave CNBC sooner.

That Hufington and Howard Dean are now considered the smart mony on CNBC, booyah.

That my President has apologized for my father’s arrogance in WW2.



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